The meaning of resilience is the ability of people to recover from difficult situations and continue moving forward into the future. These people take advantage of the difficult difficulties or traumas they experience to obtain a benefit that allows them to obtain useful resources for the future. Normally they are also people with great cognitive abilities.
What Are Resilient People
At Ecoembes we think that a resilient person or resilient people are those who are capable of facing adverse situations and even benefiting from them. People who fit this description have a long way to go both personally and professionally. Like Nelson Mandela when he said “I never lose; either I win or I learn”, resilient people show that they can come out of difficult times unscathed and also value learning from bad experiences.
But how to know if oneself is resilient? what characterize it? For this post we have collected 10 skills of people who learned to be resilient .
10 Qualities Of A Resilient Person
Adopt A Positive Attitude
Knowing how to manage emotions is key to facing any obstacle that stands in the way. As suggested by Ellis’s ABC theory – in which “A” represents the facts, “B” to the thoughts and “C” to the emotions – what determines how we feel (C) are not the things that happen to us (A ), but our way of perceiving them (B). Therefore, we have a high capacity to determine how we feel, only by looking at the way we understand what is happening.
Acting like a positive person does not imply being overly optimistic. Sometimes, there are difficult situations or extreme situations that cannot be seen in a naive way, because they are painful, and accepting the difficulty of those moments can serve to know how to act accordingly. It is simply about relativizing and trying to think of solutions, and not problems.
It can be a very effective tool for downplaying things and relaxing in times of stress. As long as it is spontaneous and natural -therefore not forced or with the intention of making people laugh at all costs- humor can be a very valuable resource.
Accepting that there are limits to everything does not mean that we have to agree with their existence. Challenges help us push what we thought were our barriers a little further, exploring possible hitherto unknown faculties of our personality along the way. Resilient people see problems as opportunities to challenge and rediscover themselves.
Frustration in many cases derives from the lack of control over a specific situation. Feeling helpless regarding an issue that matters to us can generate stress and discomfort. These people usually have self-confidence, because they believe in our resilience to influence what happens.
Recognizing one’s main strengths and abilities, as well as weaknesses, is key to identifying what we can improve, how we can rebuild ourselves so that we are more comfortable. The resilient person may have down times, but they lift themselves up and build their self-esteem in the effort. It is very important for this to learn to unlearn, and not take everything for granted. Every day you can find different ways to deal with the same issue.
Knowing how to put yourself in someone else’s shoes, getting an idea of how they might feel, is also a sign of resilience. Being empathic helps us separate thought from action, and brings us closer to the person with whom we may be having a problem. Even, who knows, maybe that lack of understanding could lead to a great future friendship.
Social support is essential and resilient people know it. To do this, they choose to surround themselves with positive people, who bring out the best in them and with whom they enjoy and learn, which does not mean automatically excluding those other people who are going through a rough patch or have some negative moments.
Not only can we not control everything that happens, but there are situations that -for sure- we will never be able to influence, such as those that we do not even know about. If we don’t know what will happen, the best we can do is learn to deal with uncertainty and learn to develop our cognitive abilities .
Many of our worries do not belong to the now, but to future situations -which, sometimes, we cannot even predict- or to events of the past, the result in many cases of guilt. Resilient people tend to be people with lateral thinking , they enjoy the small details of the present and fully live the here and now, one of the easiest ways to be positive on a day-to-day basis and to know how to relativize problems.